Unhealthy Themes in ACOTAR
*Warning contains spoilers on ACOTAR books 1 & 2*
My friends have been telling me for years that I needed to pick up the ACOTAR series. I finally caved when I was down with a cold this past July. While I found the brilliantly imaginative corners of Sarah J Maas’s mind to be captivating, I couldn’t shake some of the underlying themes within A Court of Thorns and Roses.
As someone who has lived and traveled widely, the most frequent complaints I hear from my girl friends around the world are about dating. Not just complaints about how women are treated at the early stages of a relationship, but also the toxic patterns that present themselves in more established relationships. So, it was incredibly concerning to me, as I was reading this book that had women around the world entranced, to notice some of the unhealthy relationship patterns the first book in the series seemed to romanticize.
Quick breakdown of my mental mapping here:
Tamlin (high lord faerie guy) kidnaps Feyre (poor starving girl) under the guise of her breaking a treaty and needing to return with him as payment for breaking said treaty (later found out the treaty and payment for breaking the treaty were a lie)
Tamlin is pissed off at Feyre for killing his friend, who he dressed up as a wolf, AND who he specifically sent to be killed (starving girl was hunting for the same deer as the wolf - fair play in my opinion)
Tamlin tries to romance Feyre (lots of Stockholm syndrome vibes) and continues to be deceptive about his motives in an effort to get her to say she loves him to break a curse.
Tamlin has a change of heart and sends Feyre away (bravo to him for one decent choice).
Feyre returns (again…Stockholm syndrome) to break the curse and ends up getting tortured while Tamlin sits by and does nothing.
Tamlin has one chance to free Feyre from being tortured, and instead uses it as a chance to try to hook up with her.
Ladies. So 👏 many 👏 red 👏 flags. As I read the first book, I was reminded of all the dating horror stories I’ve heard through the years and how many people normalize toxic relationships.
I will confess, I am glad my friends convinced me to read book two because Feyre does have a wake-up call about what she should be tolerating from the gents and starts sticking up for herself.
I was questioning things when she left Tamlin at the altar for a guy who used to drug her and have her perform lap dances on him in front of an unknown number of people. Shockingly, this one turned out to be a pretty decent guy, so kudos to her, but I can’t say I would’ve stuck around long enough to figure that out. I’m still waiting to see if the books acknowledge how messed up Tamlin’s kidnapping of Feyre under false pretenses was, but at least she realizes what a complete ass he was. As I’m only through book two, I’d say there’s still time for that to be addressed.
Recommended wines:
A Court of Thrones and Roses: Out of Office all the way, although you may need to pop a bottle of Cha Cha Cha for the latter half.
A Court of Mist and Fury: Skinny Dip Prosecco to celebrate Feyre ditching Tamlin and learning her worth.
X
Em